The Future Welfare of the nation depends upon the education and welfare of our families and how they rear their children. The following article emphasizes that kids must learn realtional skills from their parents and the quality of those relationship skills will largely determine how well your kids do in life.
The depression and violence among young people concern us all. The pain of families whose children hurt themselves or others causes us deep pain. There are, of course, no instant experts and no instant answers on how to change the situation. However, we do know how children develop the interpersonal and social skills necessary for success in life and that will reduce their need to react inappropriately to disappointments.
The data on reducing children’s problems are clear. Research indicates that we should involve children in church, extra-curricular school activities with caring adults who listen. Structure, discipline, adult role models, hard work and good social skills are the foundation for a secure and happy life. Below we list the skills that are most important for children to know.
Beginning Social skills
1. Listening to other people
2. Preparing for a conversation-focusing on a topic
3. Starting a conversation
4. Carrying out an interactive conversation
5. Asking good questions
6. Saying, thank you
7. Self introduction
8. Introducing other people
9. Offering compliments to others
Advanced Social Skills
10. Asking why
11. Asking for help
12. Joining in with others
13. Giving instructions
14. Following instructions
15. Apologizing
16. Convincing others
Emotional Skills
17. Emotional self knowledge
18. Expressing feelings
19. Understanding others’ feelings
20. Putting self in the place of others
21. Dealing with others’ anger
22. Expressing affection
23. Dealing with fears
24. Rewarding self
Alternatives to aggression
25. Asking permission
26. Sharing with others
27. Helping others
28. Negotiation
29. Self-control
30. Standing up for personal rights
31. Saying no
32. Responding to teasing
33. Avoiding trouble with others
34. Keeping out of fights
Stress Skills
35. Expressing a complaint
36. Answering a complaint
37. Talking after a competition
38. Dealing with embarrassment
39. Dealing with being ignored
40. Resisting group pressure
41. Responding to failure
42. Dealing with false accusation
43. Planning Skills
44. Dealing with boredom
45. Suggesting something to do
46. Finding a problem’s cause
47. Setting a goal
48. Gathering information
49. Prioritizing problems
50. Making decisions
51. Concentrating on a task
Goldstein, A.P., Sherman, M., Gershaw, N.J., Sprafkin, R.P., and Glick. Training Aggressive Youth in Prosocial Behavior, Journal of Youth and Adolescence, Vol. 7, No. 1, 1973
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